Monday, February 2, 2009

Dear Body


Dear Body,

I know you have taken some abuse in recent years, I apologize. I have taken you for granted and now I must try to make amends. I understand now that fancy creams and a loofah sponge are not enough to truly make you happy. There are so many other things to consider Body, and I have listed my promises to you below:
  • First, I promise to eliminate retched and toxic white sugar from my diet. I know that Tongue and Taste buds might be upset at first but overall, Endocrine system will be overjoyed and it will be worth upset buds.

  • I promise you Heart and Lungs to keep up all the oxygen that gets pumped into you on a regular basis. I realize that for a few years, you were starved but I am afraid you have to blame Reproductive system for that.

  • I promise you Muscular system, to really try to give you a workout. I try but it is simply not very fun to lift something up and down unless you get a fun toddler hug out of it. However, I expect something in return. I expect you to tighten up and maintain your shape when I am wearing a bathing suit or sleeveless top. No excuses this time. This is especially important for you backside muscles. 35 years is a long time to stay upright, I get it but lunges are not fun so I expect you to fall in line.

  • While I have already addressed Muscular System, I think it is important to speak directly to Abdomen. I believe you may have suffered the most, I am so very sorry. Unfortunately, I can't do much about those nasty stretch marks or c-section scars but I can really promise you that I will finally get rid of that nasty pouch you have been carrying. It must be so uncomfortable and frankly, a little embarrassing for you! I have to warn you, it might get worse before it gets better because they have these things called crunches. There are terribly unpleasant but no pain, no gain.

  • Now Skin...we have to really get serious. I accept that you cannot remain tight and firm for ever but what can I do to make sure you don't get lazy for at least a few more years?? I use great sunscreen and shield you from rays as much as I can. What more do you want?? OK, OK, I promise not to wash you with regular soap anymore and I swear I will invest in more facials. But I beg you...especially you around the eyes - cut me some slack..

Now for my requests:


  • Legs, I ask a lot of you. Not only do you keep my upright and able to be an active part of the world but I expect you to carry me for long, long, long time without rest. I want you to expel that lactic acid as quickly as possible and let that oxygen in! My guess is that it is like cocaine for your muscles so enjoy it! I appreciate your efforts but we really need to kick it up a notch. While I appreciate you hanging in there, it is time to buckle down. You also need to make nice with Feet because we need them to cooperate to be successful. Plus, as an added bonus I think it is time to chop off that little extra you got hanging on the thighs..do you really need that? Think of the nice pants you could show off if you got rid of it.

  • Lungs, get ready because there is going to be a LOT more oxygen coming in at speeds a little faster than before. I never cursed you with smoke or toxic fumes so you should be able to pick this up quick.

  • Heart. The centre of your universe. The doctor tells me that despite all my efforts, you are hurting a little and need to be cleaned up. I will dedicate significant effort to make that happen. I beg you to give me some time because I can't risk losing you. I need you for practical purposes because everybody works together better when you are happy. More importantly, I gave some of you away to my husband and children resulting in a serious risk of breaking more hearts than just you if I left. I will make it my mission that with the my help, the doctors help and your dedication, you will be all fixed up in a few months. Please don't give up because I need some more of you to give away for many years to come.

  • If I could make one last request, while I realize you are getting older, is it too much to ask that you shrink just a little?? We can only pull off a bikini for so long and I would definitely like that to be just a tiny bit longer.... please???

Thank-you, Body for listening to me. I hope we can reach a mutually beneficial agreement and not have to discuss these things again. Together we can accomplish so many great things so let's do it and stop thinking about it. Its time for action!

Your truly, the Soul of Run Mommy. :)

22 comments:

Katie said...

lol thats great! Hopefully your body will take notice now that they have been outed on the internet.

Beth said...

I love how you put this. I know our bodies have put with a lot from us over the years and now we are asking them to continue to take us to new levels all of the time. It's hard not to take things for granted!

Heather said...

What a fantastic post! Maybe that will be a little more effective than me just telling my body "Bitch, you need to get with the program!"

Run Mommy said...

Heather's comment made me really giggle - maybe I will try that instead. :)

tfh said...

Nice post. I think I need to write a letter to my own body! (Ooh, but would I want to hear the letter it writes to me?)

The Happy Runner said...

Great post! I had to laugh at Heather's comment. Too funny!

Steve Stenzel said...

HA HA! I love it!! But "toxic white sugar" is the BEST!! Good luck with that!

Ulyana said...

wow, awesome post! I just cut white sugar out of my diet too. And I have so many demands!!!!

Rookie on the Run said...

I love this post! Very creative and so true. :) I especially like what you had to say to your heart (esp. that you gave pieces of it away). AWESOME post!!

Candy said...

My body is VERY envious of this letter.

My body wishes that Candy would treat her better as well. She deserves it!!

Nicole said...

that was great - can I Cc my body in on it

Marlene said...

Heehee, good post. I hope you get a good response!

P.O.M. said...

Very cute.

Jo Lynn said...

Ooooooh, my body is jealous of that beautiful letter your body received. ;)

joyRuN said...

Great post! And amen to all of it :)

Alexandra said...

What a unique post! It's all about compromise! Good luck with working this out!

You mentioned on one of my posts that you wrote a story too for the Runners' Lounge. Did you get any acknowledgement that they received your email?

teacherwoman said...

Great post! Love it!

Missy said...

Wow, I feel guilty. I've been cussing at my body all this time and all I have to do is ask nicely?!? Mmm, a new approach may be in order:)

Janice {Run Far} said...

amen! Maybe I need to write a nice little letter to my body as well. I am thinking in my situation, it is going to take a hell of a lot more then a letter.

lindsay said...

great post! i need to start making some sacrifices for my body too if i'm going to be expecting so much of it. love heather's comment though i need to try your approach instead :)

Jill said...

I just found your blog and I love it! I'm not a marathon runner, nor is that my goal, but I am going to do another triathlon in May and I just did my first 10K.

I loved your post about your "Mommy training schedule", that put things into prespective nicely for me. I did 2 triathlons pre-kids, but now 5 years later it's a bit different training. I see the training schedules and feel defeated before I even start. BUT I have to train differently. So I'll call my schedule the Mommy schedule too. I like that. Thanks!

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